I am unaccustomed to rage.
Even as a child, I understood that the game was rigged. Over time, I've become even more aware... though I have had the luxury of not having to think about it all the time--to not have to face it, and the feelings it brings up, day in and day out. All day. Every day.
Until this week.
This week has been particularly difficult (the supreme court nomination hearings) and has exposed yet a another level of the rigged game. It brought up in me a deep rage--and I felt it all week in the pit of my stomach... I was struck by the injustice of it all.
I felt like throwing up.
It gave me the opportunity to imagine what others have felt over generations of systemic injustice.
I understand that I am both privileged and oppressed. I've benefitted from the rigged game in so many ways... from being able to walk into a store without suspicion to having access to higher education. I have also suffered from the rigged game--from wanting society and power structures to be different for others (immigrants, people of color, and the planet's living systems), to feeling unsafe at times as a woman, being called "intrinsically evil and objectively disordered" for being in a same-sex relationship.
Understanding what works to transform the systems of power has been a life-long pursuit. I do not have many answers yet for how we transform these dominant structures--except that I believe we can learn a lot from how nature does this. There are times when a little energy goes a long way and where collective action can change the rigged game.
"Do not go gentle into that good night,
Old age should burn and rave at close of day;
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.."
--Dylan Thomas